3.25.2008

Where is my fairy godmother when I need her?

I'm having a bit of a dilemma and need some advice. Everyone knows that we settled with the hospital over Riley's sponge issue. They are giving us an certain amount of money to take Riley, and the rest of the family on a trip to Disney.
From the get go, I told everyone that this is Riley's money. Not ours. She went through a horrific situation that was not necessary, and has been compensated for it.

Ok, here comes my dilemma.

We've just been told that we need a new roof on our house - like yesterday. The amount that we are receiving from the hospital will cover the cost of the roof.
Many people have told us that we should use the Riley money for the roof and then take the kids to Disney when Carson and Cooper are older.

My other dilemma.

If the hospital knew that we used the money for the roof, I'm not sure they'd be very happy.

I am torn between all of this. I know what we need, and I know what my heart says, and believe me, there not the same.

HELP!

9 comments:

Michelle said...

Take Riley & Keegan to Disney! C & C are still young, they can go next time. Would that save you enough money? And with that & the tax rebate $ coming in the spring put a new roof on?

I feel for ya... A new roof, after the new bathroom. Where ARE those fairy godmothers, anyway?!

Angela said...

I can feel your pain, we need a new furnace & A/C ... not cheap at all.

Honestly, you all NEED a little break from this reality you've been dealt. Probably even more than you NEED a roof! You have been and will be enduring a lot of stress - your sanity and the family's needs to have some attention too. Don't discount that because it isn't as visible as the roof problem.

As for paying for the roof ... there is that tax rebate for some of it ... finance it? home equity loan? worst case, credit card? Find a way to give your family a break!!

tish said...

Okay, I have a totally different view on this and maybe it's because I'm from a different generation. So don't take offense -- I'm just putting it out there because you asked. BUT, the economy sucks right now. May get worse. You've got to plan for that -- we all do. Jobs could disappear. Everything is beginning to cost more. Oil prices affect every product on the market. The stock market is shaky. All this affects our economic future. It's a good thing to put some money aside just in case...! I can't tell you how many times I've tried to explain that to my kids (your generation & slightly younger) and they just don't get it because they've never experienced want. Mom & Dad have always come through when they were out of money. I've put them on notice that they have to take care of themselves (so that we can begin planning how much money we may or may not have when we retire) and if they choose to spend their money on things they don't really need, it will not be my problem when a crisis looms over their head. Betsy left a good-paying, good benefit job to take a low-paying, no-benefit job that she likes. That's good for the soul, but not for the budget. She's struggling and that's a good thing. It will help her get in touch with economic reality. Sometimes she complains she doesn't have any food in the house. Too bad. She has options that she's not exercising.

You now have an option. You guys need to "keep a roof over your family's collective heads" and apparently you can't put that off. A vacation can be put off. And quite frankly, 2-year olds won't "get" Disney as well as they would when they're 5 or 6. They'd probably be delighted with a 2-3 day trip to a Dells indoor waterpark. Sure Disney would be fun, but it is expensive and if you don't have a blank check from Comer's, it might be too expensive right now.

Now, did you sign a contract with the hospital? Did they specify you must go to Disney with the money? And you know that the trip will likely cost more than they have given you. Are they going to come up with that extra money? Who in their right mind would take retribution on you for using the money to put on a new roof that you truly need? I'm sure they won't ask for it back.

I'm sure this isn't the answer you were looking for. But as excited as I am for this windfall coming your way, I'm also trying to look at both sides of the equation. Plus, I believe you said Matt won't be able to enjoy the whole trip because he doesn't have much vacation left. That's not fair to him, either.

Okay, Cindy. That's my 2 cents. It all comes down to a generational view. But in today's shaky economy, we are all doing with less than we'd ideally like to have or do -- even us established folks who have a few bucks in the bank.

annie said...

Hi Cindy!

Wow! I feel for you with your dilemma.

When I was young, my godmother had died and left me about $500. My parents had just purchased a new home and needed many things. They used that money and never got around to replacing it. I understand why they did it, but I do feel a small amount of resentment for it. The money had been left in my name and I certainly could have used it in the future for college or my wedding.

You would have been given the same diagnosis on the roof with or without the Comer's money.

Do you have to go to Disney with the money? I agree that your family needs a break. Disney World is a fabulous place, I've been there several times with my kids. But I would seriously be thinking about investing it for Riley's future.

Just my opinion. Take care!

Anonymous said...

I personally don't think you should use your daughter's money for your home repairs. Use the tax rebate money and/or put it on a credit card. What would you have done if you didn't have the money??

BoufMom9 said...

Cindy, I am sorry you have been put in this position. It's a hard place to be- deciding between what is necessary and what you feel is right.
I would have to say that although I would want to take all 4 on the trip, I do agree with the other ladies who suggested taking just the older 2. Then, maybe use some of the money to go toward the roof?
I can tell you, more times than I wanted to, I have used money that was supposed to be for "fun" to do something that was just necessary and I have felt awful every single time. It's going to be a difficult decision no matter what and ultimately, it won't really matter what we all suggest.
Just do what you think is right for your family. But please, keep this in mind, the hospital "settled" with you. It's not their business to tell you how to spend it. Had they gone to court, maybe. But, they didn't.

Jean said...

If you need a new roof, you need to pay for it somehow. Whatever the amount of money is... what about using it for the roof and setting aside an account to pay for Disney next year or the year after. I agree that C&C would enjoy Disney if they were older. However, you do deserve a break too...
So back to my original thought, what about giving your child some interest on her money that you borrowed from her. Even if it is $50 or $100.

Anonymous said...

My son just called me from Disneyland. They took the 2 boys. Ages 7 and 1. Even my one yr old grandson is having alot of fun. The thing that I think would bother me and you is going and not taking all the kids. I would be thinking about the ones we didn't take the entire time and feeling guilty.I also think the hospital knows they are lucky they didn't get drug into court and could care less what you do with the money. I think you should pray about it and wait for an answer. I think you are such a wonderful family. I know you need some fun and to laugh a little right about now. My prayers are with you, debi

Amy W said...

Having taken a 15 month old to Disney as well as a two year old...they still have fun.

Tough, really tough choice.